Fortunately I grew up with a family where the dreams, likes and dislikes of girls and boys are considered or seen equal.They believed that both men and women have same level of hunger, thirst, dreams, likes and voices in their lives.Yes, we were among the lucky ones, and am also lucky to have a husband who support my dreams and helps me achieve it. But this is not the case for many families in India. Many girls are not allowed to achieve their goals, in fact, they are not even allowed to have a goal. Mothers groom their girls to be a perfect wife/daughter-in-law, They forget to make them good, strong, smart individuals. A famous director (women) once said that its cruel to put a stop to women's dreams. SO TRUE!!
There are families in India, where seperate rules are laid out for for men and women. When men can have their own dreams, women can't. When men can wear whatever they want, women has to wear or chose dresses which every member of the family likes or approves.Why are people still so narrow minded? Men can get tired, but women can't. What the hell? Why there are so many "No"s to women. Aren't we stopping a girl child from dreaming and achieving her dreams.How unfair? There are many smart girls who grow up to become silent and unhappy in their lives. What is happening to them? The family they are born or the family they are married to are forcing them to be dumb and deaf. I am not a feminist, but very closed friends or people in my life are preys of this Indian mentality.
What can we do about it? Many things.
1. Talk to the girls and make them believe that they should have their goals, and they should work hard to achieve them. Work hard to learn, work hard to make the people in her life understand and accept her as an individual.
2. Find a job and be independent. At least they get 8 to 9 hours a day to be themselves.
3. Slowly make other people in your life understand that there is a person inside you like their son, who has goals, and who loves stand on her own feet.
4. Parents please make sure that your daughter goes to a family where she will be given respect. And also appreciation for the wonderful person she is.
5. Spend some of your salary for your family or husband's family members who still hold on to this old thinking. Who doesn't like gifts?
6. Focus on your goal, whatever it may happen.
7. If you have .1% chance of getting an opportunity to learn, grab it and use it to achieve your goal.
These are just few of my ideas to help yourself and people who need help. I know many women who wants to raise their voice against this Indian mentality, but they cant due to so many factors in their lives. But once they/You learn to stand for themselves, no one can stop you from achieving it.
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